Trust the Journey

Eric is not too serious - even after winning a medal

One of my favorite swim coaches came to me in frustration yesterday at the Regional Swimming Championships.  She said, "Chris, you are also both a coach and a parent like me.  As a Coach, I can stay calm through all the ups and downs on the team, but as a Parent, I feel such exasperation with my own kids (who are swimmers) sometimes!" 

You parents understand this feeling and why it happens.  Take just the swimming example in my own experience.  To get to the Regional Champs this past weekend was a 12.5 year journey involving sacrifice, time and money.  Starting with the little kid swimming lessons and persevering through all the trials and tribulations of learning how to swim and swim well, to the costs each year for swim team for two kids, to the time sacrifice (and career sacrifices that I've made to be able to get my kids to all the practices), not to mention all of the athletic endeavors that I've skipped to be spend weekends at swim meets, we parents have a HUGE role in getting our kids to have a positive experience in a sport like swimming.  It is far too easy to get caught up in the moment and to believe that any one meet or race is an indicator of the success of the entire swimming journey. 

It is not.

I am so lucky to be both parent and coach to my own kids and coach/teacher to many kids.  So, my perspective is enriched by all of my own experiences.  (And I am far from the perfect parent or coach, trust me!) 

My advice to her was to "trust the journey."  The success of this wonderful project that is known as child rearing is not determined by any one moment or race.  One frustrating day at the pool does not mean failure.  There will be ups and downs in performance and in attitude.  They will love and not love certain practices and seasons.  They will plateau or even get slower during growth spurts and developmental changes.  There will be great coaches and not as great coaches that guide them.  There will be significant disappointments and seemingly insurmountable challenges.  And it is all of that that makes the project so darn wonderful when it comes together in a magical performance or season.

Be patient and wonderful things will happen

As parents, our job is to hang on for the ride, be patient and stay calm.  Trust the Journey - with all of the ups and downs.  We are the lucky ones!